Yay! The award, it turns out, is named after the bear, not the lingerie. (In case you were wondering.)
I’m particularly excited about winning an award with bear-inspired nomenclature since I actually have a good history with bear-related prizes: when I was eight, I won the Most Disgusting Putrescent Teddy Bear of New York City Award.
Actually, Flopsoy won it. I’ve owned Flopsoy since birth, which perhaps explains why he looks like he was run over by a lawnmower, put through a paper shredder, and then gobbled and regurgitated by pirahnas. He is gross. And I’m not sure exactly why he’s named Flopsoy, though I think it was because I couldn’t pronounce Flopsy correctly, not because I had an affinity for soy.
In any case, when I was eight, I made my mother take me to the New York City Teddy Bear Festival, which was sponsored by Gund and held in a huge conference room at Bloomingdale’s. I think the official title that Flopsoy won was Most Loved Bear, or something equally dignified, but it might as well have been Most Fetid, since the majority of the entrants looked like they had passed through several mammals’ digestive systems.
Here is Flopsoy, in all his glory:
The Teddy Book Award ceremony will take place at the Texas Book Festival this Saturday at 3pm! Flopsoy may be in attendance.